Marriage is no easy ride–this is May Taher’s message in her latest book, “When the Honeymoon is Over.” The collection of short stories was first published by Shabab Books in June. It tackles such thorny marital issues as love, infidelity, devotion and sacrifice.
The black-and-white photo of the sultry-looking young woman on the cover is what first caught my eye; the lady's full red lips, nose ring, black wavy locks and bitter smirk are provoking. “I wanted to use my experience in advertising to create a flashy cover to catch my reader’s eye,” explains Taher to Al-Masry Al-Youm.
All the stories revolve around the subject of marriage. “I wanted single women to know about marriage and how it is once the honeymoon is over,” says Taher, meaning that she wanted to explore the moment when the romance fades into something more real, and often less passionate. When a marriage proves itself to be less that the bride expected, some women change their minds halfway while others nest in their new homes, hoping that one day things might change for the better.
The book is rich with all kinds of female characters: strong, stubborn, cunning, deceptive, passive, funny and vindictive. “The book is not part of a certain trend, it's simply about female empowerment,” says Taher, a young mother.
“I love men,” she adds. “I could never be labeled a feminist.”
Both partners must nourish the relationship; marriage is a work in progress. Women are usually programmed to put others before them and silence themselves in order to fit in and belong to an accepted social image: the devoted wife and mother. It makes sense that Taher’s book appeals to the many women who have read it.
Taher’s characters are familiar and relatable. They are our family, friends, colleagues and acquaintances. The stories are cozy, told with accessible language that is simple yet eloquent. The deft use of dialogue brings the work of fiction together.
Taher’s favorite character is Maha, a wife who responds to her husband’s infidelity by gracefully separating and moving on with her life. “People marry for the wrong reasons, and after investing time and money into the engagement, they are usually reluctant to break it off despite the warning signs,” says Taher.
Her advice for women is to not be lazy and to continue working on their marriages, to go on dates with their husbands and spice up their sex lives, to forgo material items in favor of an emotional connection, especially when children are in the picture. “Forget about the LVs and the Burberry bags," she says. "It isn't a best mom competition!”
On the topic of cheating, Taher states simply that she supports anything that bolsters the happiness in a relationship. There is no right or wrong answer, she says, so whether a woman decides to forgive a cheating husband or resolves to divorce, it is completely up to that couple's particular circumstances.
Taher encourages young women and men to take their time, study, work, travel and meet new people. “We need to stop acting as if we will miss the train,” she says, laughing. Rushing into a marriage, she asserts, usually backfires.
But just because Taher believes that every relationship is unique doesn’t mean that she doesn’t have a secret recipe for success: 50 percent love; 20 percent compatibility; and 30 percent sex. “Sex–not chocolate or ice cream–is the one thing that makes you feel loved and appreciated,” the author says.
